This is a great look to start with if you're new to wearing your PJs in public. Hide your shame with a stylish hat and some customised shades, and hey presto! No one will ever know it's you.
Straight from disco to drop-off! Give the impression that you've come straight from a fabulous all-nighter. Add a suitcase, and you can pretend you just got off the plane from Ayia Napa.
Demure, sophisticated, elegant - this look is easily achieved with a classy hat. For extra style points, borrow your husband's dressing gown, and tell everyone it's "Balmoral check."
Inspired by another great style icon, this look is great for propping up post-breastfeeding boobs. Just make sure you wear it with attitude, or you'll just look like you work in a call centre.
Slip on some satin and waltz your way to the school gates in this jazzy number. A pair of Marigolds make ideal "evening gloves."
Pretend you're fabulously wealthy with some subtle accessorising. This look works especially well if you want the neighbours to think your kids go to private school.
The important thing is that your kids get to school on time. As long as you achieve that, it's really nobody's business whether you're wearing a ball gown or a bin bag. Here at the Scummy Mummies, we prefer gold Lycra catsuits - they're glamorous, flattering, and wipe clean. But ultimately, wear whatever the fuck you want.
A new episode of The Scummy Mummies Podcast is released every fortnight - listen free via scummymummies.com or iTunes. We're on Facebook and Twitter - @scummymummies.