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The Love Snap: Sharing a love of stuff with your kids

8/1/2016

12 Comments

 
Picture
Just because a kid was made by your body, with your DNA, there are no guarantees they will be anything like you. Or that they will like the things you like. Let's be frank, sometimes this really sucks balls. Why won't my daughter wear jeans? Why doesn't my son appreciate Chess: The Musical? Why won't they at least try curry sauce on their chips? Shouldn't they have downloaded all this shit during the nine months they were in my womb?
 
I know, I should embrace my children's wonderful unpredictability and respect their individual choices. Even if those choices involve wearing revolting polyester dresses and spending four hours watching YouTube videos of diggers.
 
And to be fair, they have introduced me to a whole new world. I used to be into classical music and gourmet food. Now I'm happy to nod along to One Direction, and eat chicken nuggets the exact shape and colour of Donald Trump's hair.
 
All the same, I can't help feeling a rush of joy when my kids express a liking for something I adored before they were born. I call this the Love Snap. It's that moment when they hear ABBA on the radio and start dancing like lunatics, or properly laugh at The Simpsons, or take their first bite of a Peppermint Aero and run around shouting, "I LOVE THIS!" It just makes my heart want to burst.
 
It's important, though, to respond carefully. Don't do what I do and reply in a massively over-enthusiastic fashion: "YEAH! Isn't it like THE BEST THING EVER???!!!!", so that your kids stop dancing or laughing or eating, and stare at you like the giant weirdo you are. We must remember that as mums, we have the power to make something horrendously uncool and unloved in an instant.
 
Now my kids are four and seven, I treasure each Love Snap moment and hold on to them tightly. I am all too aware that the teenage years are looming. I am bracing myself for all the slamming doors and swearing. I remember being 15, and if my kids are anything like me, they will want to be nothing like me. It's normal, and with a bit of luck, we'll get through it.
 
In recent years, the really great thing has been rediscovering Love Snap moments with my own mother. Now we're older, wiser, and have both been through the experience of parenting, we have discovered new shared loves. I finally understand the wonders of a proper cup of tea, Fortnum and Mason's scones and nice linen.
True, I don't think my mum will ever share a bowl of chips and curry sauce with me. But the more time passes, the more important those Love Snap moments with both my parents and my kids become. Perhaps DNA is stronger than I thought.

A new episode of The Scummy Mummies Podcast is released every fortnight - listen free via scummymummies.com or  iTunes. We're on Facebook and Twitter - @scummymummies. 

12 Comments
Simon K
29/1/2016 02:01:16 am

See, I'm completely with you on most of this. But disliking Chess: The Musical? Sorry kid, you might only be four, but some things are just not on. Pack your bags and get out.

"Oh my dear how boring, he's defecting..."

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