{"product_id":"merry-xmess-red-green-sweatshirt","title":"MERRY XMESS Red \u0026 Green Unisex Sweatshirt","description":"\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eChristmas isn’t always like you see in the movies. It’s forgetting to defrost the turkey. It’s eating mince pies for breakfast. It’s failing to send any cards, then sending a drunken HPPY CHIRSTMAS WhatsApp to everyone in your contacts on 24 December, including three ex-boyfriends and your old driving instructor. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eThis year, let’s embrace the chaos with this super soft, environmentally friendly sweatshirt. Wear it with pride, and show everyone just how many f**** you give about the pine needles on the carpet. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003ePLEASE READ BEFORE PURCHASE - IMPORTANT INFORMATION REGARDING SIZES, EXCHANGES AND RETURNS\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e:\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHow long does delivery take?\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eLAST ORDERS FOR GUARANTEED CHRISTMAS DELIVERY 13th December\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSome items are printed on demand, this may take anywhere from 3-10 working days before items are dispatched, however at peak times the dispatch time can be longer. Helen can only lick so many envelopes a day. \u003cstrong\u003ePlease note your items may arrive separately.\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003cspan\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eAnd delivery is FREE within the UK! \u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e \u003c\/span\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- Certified Organic Cotton Sweatshirt, 300g\/m2. We’re no mathematicians but trust us, those numbers equal QUALITYYY. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- GM free. You will find absolutely no GMs hiding in our t-shirts, guaranteed. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- Not tested on animals. OK, we did once put one on Helen’s cat, but he liked it. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- Does not contain animal-derived products. We stopped doing the wool t-shirts as they were a bit scratchy.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- Printed in the UK with low waste printing tech. We loathe high waste printing tech. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003e- Made in a renewable energy powered factory audited for a wide range of social and sustainability criteria. Actual people with clipboards came round and ticked the boxes with little pens like the ones you used to get in Argos. \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eI’ve got ketchup on the front. How do I wash it?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eMachine wash cool, inside out with like colours. Only non-chlorine bleach. Hang dry flat. Do not tumble dry, medium\/hot iron. Do not iron decoration. Do not chuck it in the machine with your son’s football kit, put it on a boil wash, and hope for the best.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cb\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eHow does it fit?\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003eWe’ve specially chosen these sweatshirts for their comfy fit. The sweatshirts are available in sizes from XS to XXL - please check our size guide for reference before buying. Each item is customised, so sorry, but we can’t refund or replace items if you order the wrong size or colour, or just change your mind. Damaged or faulty items are refundable, obvs. We’re not monsters.\u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp class=\"normal\"\u003e\u003cspan lang=\"en\" xml:lang=\"en\"\u003ePlease check the size guide before you order your item! Thank you! \u003c\/span\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch4\u003e\u003cstrong\u003e\u003cem\u003eOrganic Sweatshirt\u003c\/em\u003e\u003c\/strong\u003e\u003c\/h4\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eCentimetres\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ctable width=\"421\"\u003e\n\u003ctbody\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"90\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eSize\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eXS\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eS\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eM\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eL\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eXL\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"56\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eXXL\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"90\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eHeight\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e171\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e175\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e179\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e183\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e189\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"56\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e195\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"90\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eChest\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e86\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e93\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e99\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e104\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e116\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"56\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e129\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003ctr\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"90\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eWaist\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e71\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e76\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e81\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e89\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"55\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e99\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003ctd width=\"56\"\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e112\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003c\/td\u003e\n\u003c\/tr\u003e\n\u003c\/tbody\u003e\n\u003c\/table\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e \u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eChest\u003c\/strong\u003e: Measure all round your chest just below your armpits. Don’t squash the boobs.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eWaist\u003c\/strong\u003e: Measure round your waistline, where your trousers would button up. Try not to think about where they used to button up before lockdown.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eHeight\u003c\/strong\u003e: Measure your height. You probably know how to do this. If not, we’re not sure how we can help you.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eIf you fall between the sizes, go for the larger of the two. Comfier anyway, innit.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Scummy Mummies","offers":[{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":37401010864295,"sku":"33816378","price":42.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":37401010897063,"sku":"33816381","price":42.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":37401010929831,"sku":"33816384","price":42.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":37401010962599,"sku":"33816387","price":42.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false},{"title":"White \/ XXL","offer_id":37401011028135,"sku":"33816390","price":42.0,"currency_code":"GBP","in_stock":false}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0347\/6180\/1773\/products\/ccba9a26f3aaf73010cf04d5c5bf22e4.jpg?v=1606383062","url":"https:\/\/www.scummymummies.com\/products\/merry-xmess-red-green-sweatshirt","provider":"Scummy Mummies Shop","version":"1.0","type":"link"}